by Walt Zientek

'Twas the night before Christmas,
Too hot for a blizzard.
Not a creature was stirring,
Not even the lizard!

With me in my cut-offs
And Mom in her tube-tops,
I'm sweating and sunburned
I pray that the temp drops!

A fat guy was taken
To the hospital today.
He was racing around
In a funny old sleigh!

Wearing red flannel
From head to his toes!
Delivering presents
All covered with bows.

We think the heat got him,
Caused him to fall
Off of our rooftop,
He bounced like a ball!

As the ambulance came,
I heard him yell,
"Forget Christmas out here,
It's hotter than HELL!"